Suspicious Mind

Stilton Ice Cream - looks better than it tastes.

I have been googling a bit and I am smelling a very large rat. Apparently the suckers doing the cooking on the TV are supposed to be 'celebrities' from various fields. If I'm a celebrity the cat's a dog. Perhaps I am being put in as a geriatric Chantelle to try and fool the other suckers that I am a celeb. Ha ha ha.

I must purchase MPW's White Slave autobiog immediately and read this before confirming any rash decisions. Imagine having to go into the programme and tell a pack of lies about yourself. My face would reveal all - if not I should be given an equity card immediately. I am highly suspicious of the Hell's Kitchen house concept. I shall read more about this, and think more (a first for me). My friends think they might put me in with loads of young guys who have been told there will be a glamorous tart coming in. My cartoonist friend suggested that if MPW shouted at me I could pretend not to hear as he was so far away, being v. tall. My cartoonist friend said he could feed me a few good lines, such as 'put this in the fridge or it'll go off faster than Marco Pierre's wives'. Well, I thought it was quite funny.