Poor Old Ex

'Dagon' is absolute rubbish and not all that scary. Quite unintentionally funny in bits, though. I had remembered it being better in Spain. Months of watching DVDs every night there obviously blunted any sense of discrimination I may have had. Shows the dumbing down effect of isolation. In Spain I tended to watch mainly Spanish and French films as I liked them more than the American ones.

My first ex husband turned up today. We had a short drink in the local while he expressed a desire to reacquaint himself with the rest of the family. Poor chap has been mentally ill for many years and has gradually fallen out with everyone because of his behaviour, suddenly starting to get aggressive and shouting at people. Not least of his problems is that he smells appalling as he never washes and wears the same clothes for years. Actually I am not sure he never washes, but his clothes absolutely reek. Despite my plucking up the courage to mention this on several occasions old bad habits have died hard, and he seems incapable of changing his ways, but it is a bit of a shame as I think the smell and general filth explains his inability to find friends. I have tried buying him new clothes, but he will not throw the old ones away. This year I could not bring myself to have him in the house. When he came around last year the place seemed to stink for days, literally.

He seems to have lost weight but told me he does not eat at all in the day - just drinks lots of black coffee and eats a meal in the evening. The only reason I see him is that I send him some money every year and I think he feels he has to see me to thank me. Next year I shall have to pretend to be too busy. It was suggested that I stop sending the money, but I suspect it is the only present he gets, so don't want to do this.

What is strange is that when I met him he was a young student at Oxford, very dapper and often wearing embroidered waistcoats as was the fashion then. He took great care with his appearance. It is so sad to see him now, remembering how he once was.